Saturday, April 25, 2009

How am I?

I am ok today, tomorrow I don't know, the day after... the same. The past weeks have been surreal and I don't see this changing anytime soon. What I do know is that I miss her deeply.

After the whirlwind of finding out, informing, coming together and doing there was an empty void which I decided to fill by walking to our river every morning after dropping Meghi off at school. The power of the river, with the spring melt-off, has provided a measure of healing I didn't expect and this is good. I sit on a bench and listen to it roaring by and I mourn in bits and pieces. I feel her there.

I see her in the cherry blossoms, also, their soft pink petals remind me of her. I will look forward to spring in a very different way from now on as I wait for these blossoms to return year after year.

C

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